We golfed over Thanksgiving weekend. Mom, April, Lani, and I faced off in an epic
competition against the very laws of physics while Tom played for the mere
glory of hitting a golf ball into a hole. The 4 hour nine hole game was full of thrills,
spills, and almost a few kills (more on that later).
The first hole made us question the
sanity of our society as we discovered that people had built their homes right
on the fairway. This naturally caused April,
Lani, and me to timidly smack our golf balls into the massive expanse of brush
that stood between where we teed off, and the fairway. What incentive drove them to offer up their
homes as “golfing hazards” like the sand traps, ponds, or nearby forests? We couldn’t fathom a reason so Mom in
righteous indignation shanked a ball at a house in protest, and would have
taken out a window if she had just put a little more oomph into it. She then followed that up by casually
performing the first trick shot of the day.
In the pictures below you will see that even though she swings her club
with great force and hits the ball, the ball ends up behind the club! This trick shot was so popular that the rest
of us, except Tom, continued to attempt it throughout the rest of the game to
varying degrees of success. Tom just
kept trying to whack the ball into the hole in as few hits, strokes, whatever
as possible. Boring!
We discovered around the third
or fourth hole our style of play was more deliberate than most. I guess not all golfers appreciate the time
intensive nature and craftsmanship required to do trick shots. I will also admit that some time may have
been used by a few balls giving their lives to the game as they were hit into
brush, ponds, or perhaps taken up into heaven in the Rapture (we don’t know they just vanished). Anyway, we decided to allow some of the
golfers behind us to “play through.” Some of the golfers decided to bypass us,
and just go to the next hole. Perhaps they
saw Mom’s trick shot and thought they’d
be safer ahead of us instead of behind us?
Yet, other golfers decided to run roughshod over us. One particularly exciting experience was when
we pulled well off the fairway to let a group “play through.” As we hunkered down behind our carts a ball
fell from the sky landed with a thud in the middle of our little caravan of carts,
and only five feet or so from April.
Then a faintly hollered “Fore!” followed like a child at the end of a
great dane’s leash. When the golfers
came to see if they had gotten us, Tom kindly explained to them that they need to
yell “Fore!” before ball lands on someone.
They didn’t look convinced, but Tom’s wisdom seemed on point to me.
With the constant pressure of
having golfers at our backs waiting for us, we created unique method of teeing
off that still allowed us to play our “style” of golf. In the picture below you can see the lovely
ladies of our group all teeing off at the same time. This sped up our game just enough that we
were able to finish without making the other golfers wait more than five or ten
minutes at each of the last three holes. Its nickname is 3T's, aka The Triple Threat, and if you had been there you would know just how much of a threat it was.
It also provided enough time that I
could practice a few special shots of my own.
In the pictures you’ll see how I was able to really get under that
ball. Just look at that trajectory!
Even though there were some scary
moments, lots of duck poop, and a few mumblings about the cold weather and how
it affected one’s ability to grip the clubs, we had fun, and it wasn't harrowing.
Oh my dad! This is like the first post ever that you ever posted! YAY!
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