Today I had a follow up appointment with my cardiologist. I have p.o.t.s and non sustained ventricular tachycardia. I've had it for over 2 years now. So, that means I've had to make some changes in my life and be patient with the symptoms and my medical doctors as we figure out together the best way to alleviate my ills. I've tried a few heavy pharmaceuticals, to no avail. I changed my diet & lifestyle (I've had to say no to chocolate , sugar, natural sugars, artificial sweeteners, eat more vegetables, load up on salt and water, and eat 5 small meals rather than three large ones each day, and also forego exercise) which perhaps has helped some.
To be quite honest, the only thing I know for certain has worked is prayer. God has been good to me. I know he has a purpose for allowing me to go through this trial in life. He hasn't taken this sickness from me (yet- but I know he will in his own time), but he has given me strength when I've needed it, he has allowed me to function and be able to attend church and family events, he has even lightened my load and strengthened me to be able to deal with things. I've received miracles as He has mercifully relieved me of some of my symptoms completely the instant I asked. I have seen his hand in my life and he has worked miracles in my behalf, and I cannot deny that his power is real and does heal.
Through my ordeal I've been learning that I did not have the kind of patience that I thought I did. I am learning patience. I can also say that I have gained an amount of self-mastery that I probably would not have valued enough to make the life change otherwise. What I mean by that is my emotions, like those times when I am passionately angry, cause me to physically suffer. I get sick, weak, dizzy, numb, shaky, difficulty breathing, and probably heart issues. So, and I'm not perfect at this, I am still learning, but I have learned to reel in my emotions and make a conscious decision about how I will react in certain situations. Most things are not worth getting angry over. I have also developed a great of gratitude for having health and energy to do normal daily tasks. I realize more now that our lives are fragile and God is in charge.
So, getting back to today, I felt nauseous this morning and weak and shaky at times, but God blessed me to be able to feel well enough to get to my appointment to see the cardiologist. And I probably should clarify that when I say I felt well enough to go, I mean that I felt fine, like a normal, I'm-not-sick kind of person would feel. That's probably why most people don't realize that there's anything wrong with me. I can feel normal sometimes, make that many times, and those are probably the times that the public sees me. But if you live with me or are close to me, you know that I have my moments pretty much daily, and I get through them.
All this being said, the purpose for my post today is gratitude to God. You see, when I went to the cardiologist he was pleased with my progress concerning the nonsustained ventricular tachycardia, and he has approved me to do light-weight exercise and I can even eat honey and organic maple syrup in moderation! This is huge for me! Huge!!!
So let it be known around the world that our struggles amount to something, and there is always hope. Can I get an amen?